Supporting WOXY
18 months ago, I posted about the signing off of WOXY.com, as the financial burden of running both a land and internet based independent radio station became too much. The air waves went sadly silently when they could not raise the money necessary to continue to be independent.

After a brief silence, the station received an anonymous donation that would allow them to stay online for 12 months – buying time for them to organize a new business model. They managed to stretch it for 18 months, but the advertising model they hoped for never took hold. There is some interesting commentary on why it did not work. Being an internet-only radio station, traditional advertisers were not hip on using internet only advertising, while – since the station is audio, traditional banner style internet radio didn’t quite catch on due to the fact that people are not on the site per se. This is an interesting dilemma to those who study/think about the impact of technology.

So – they are turning to a subscription based model for the time being. For 33¢ a day (or $9.95/m) you can get crystal clear reception (although it says 2000 accesses a month … so for now I am leaving it on all the time heh). If any of you who read this space, who enjoy independent radio and would like to support the station – please go here and check out how you can support and keep listening to a great station with great DJ’s.

Proposed CIN6011 Project
Although there are quite a few options suggested for the cinema, video games and interactive fiction course that I am taking, my mind has been naturally processing a few ideas. Although surely, it has been done before, I am thinking of looking at exploring the learning process of play versus the comprehensive elements in film. What I mean by this is, I would evaluate how I learn to play the game I chose (FFX-2) this would include anything necessary to understand the game-play – narrative, interface, controls etc with that of understanding my film (Nightmare Before Christmas) … How does an individual situate the film’s context, narrative, character development … both rely on some sort of stored knowledge, but to what degree do they differ.

After reading Aarseth’s article on Game Studies Methodologies, among others, what makes game studies different than other fields is the importance of personal experience. And so, alot of research coupled with the personal experience of play will yield different results. One’s play experience must be measured with and against former studies within (and out) of the field, and will vary depending on the play skill of the researcher – but I think it is what can potentially make an old idea (or one that has surely been done before like the one above) new.

In Deconstruction
Comes reconstruction…those of you who know me, know that I don’t like to simply deconstruct something and leave it lying in pieces on the floor. My personal issue with post modern theory in general is that it is great at tearing things apart, but nary a solution in sight to rebuild what they have destroyed. Now, I understand that in some cases, the deconstruction (of say, grand narratives) is exactly the point. But to sit there and say ‘there is no truth, its all relative, we are all going to hell in a handbasket’ (sorry no links to that fictional quote) and not offer anything in return reminds me of someone who complains about the way things are and are too lazy to do anything about it. (we’ve all met the type at least ONCE in our lives – admit it!!)

So, my point is this. Yes, I am currently dismayed with the current state of my research and the state of the field in general. This is not to say that there are not new things coming to light – but that nothing that has seriously challenged the way I think (in terms of game studies). So – instead of walking away, hands in the air and head drooping, I decided to see if I cannot reconstruct the things that are either a) not broken but weak (imo) or b) things that are broken and have been left behind. What this means is – instead of bailing on the game studies thing – why not work towards revealing some of the depth that there is, if it is indeed there. Instead of complaining that all is lost – I will look for a solution.

Looking for Something More
Over the last few weeks, those who know me, know that I have been on the lower end of creative these days. I have been blaming it on coursework, extra curricular workload, family responsibilities and any other reason I could think of – but last night, during a good conversation with a good friend, I’ve realized what has been eating at me.

I want something more…

Something more than video games. As much as I enjoy what I do, I get hit sometimes with this feeling of questioning how important the research I am doing really is. Now, this isn’t my usual “i am not saving third world countries” spiel, but rather, intellectually, how deep can I go with my current line of research? I have read so much in my field, and although I find so much of it interesting, I just don’t get that ‘goosebumpy feeling’ I get when I read good theory. Theory on the nature of the social, on the structures that govern the social and everything that surrounds the big questions of why. My friend had similar feelings (approaching different questions of course) and we laughed wondering if we were not more ‘philosophers at heart’ than sociologists, when we took stock of all the theory we’ve loved over the course of our studies.

Last year, when I wrote my Honour’s Thesis, my advisor had asked me a question: Am I approaching identity from a sociological perspective using games as a tool of expression? Or, am I talking about videogames and identity using Sociology as my tool? For a while, I thought I had the answer…

after last night, I am not so sure.

I think the questions I am asking in terms of identity, structure and games are relevant – but I think I can (and should) go well beyond the scope of games … after reading de Certeau’s The Practice of Everyday Life over the last few days, I am struck at the bigger potential of what it is I study – and I want to do something with that.

Slow Gamer
As my skill climbs the steep learning curve of the micromanagement based rpg FFX-2, my partner has finished the game twice. Seems, once you’ve finished the game, you can start over with all your stats and money. I am curious as to what – besides ease – does this give a player. Why is starting over after completing a game with all the benefits different than using a cheat in the first place? Besides personal satisfaction, does it alter the play at all I wonder? At this rate, I am no where near finding out for myself, as I am still at 7% completion…

Intellectual Liminality
There has been an outpouring of call for papers for upcoming conferences, special edition journals and whatnot, yet I have not been able to write an abstract for any one of them. I have been wrestling with this (as some of you know) lately, wondering where my ambition has gone these days.

I realized, thanks to a colleague, that I just don’t have anything new to say at the moment. I am still working on my coursework, and a few other organizational tasks, not to mention my children. I feel, in a lot of ways, that my rush of ideas that have driven me over the last 2 years is coming to a slowing halt. It is not that I am no longer interested in what I am doing, but that I feel I need to wrap this body of work on identity, structure and mmo’s (cumulated over the last 2 years) into my thesis.

Don’t get me wrong – once my thesis is written, I expect to climb up another mountain of ideas and want to share them with the world. But for now, I don’t want to say what I have already said just to be ‘productive’. I am still young (academically) and have many years ahead of myself to burn myself out ;o)

On that note, back to reading course material!

Metal Gear Solid 3: Rivetting
Spent another Friday evening cuddled up in bed with my partner, youngest daughter, popcorn and the PS2. It happened quite by accident as my partner had decided to replay Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater, and I got sidetracked by the cut scenes. There are an enormous amount of cut scenes that constantly interrupt gameplay – which my partner found annoying at times, wishing he could just get on with the fighting. Ironically, as a spectator I was annoyed at the interuptions as well, but not for the same reasons… I was annoyed at the interruptions of my movie – the game play disturbed the flow for me, so I found myself telling him to hurry up and “kill that guy already!”. Some nicely done voice-overs, and pretty decent (if not cheezy at times) dialogue. Philosophies on world peace and the path of inner strength and inner peace. I found it poetic – my partner found it painstakingly long.

On a complete side note; I found it interesting that while Snake (and other male cast members) battled on throughout the game, they got increasingly dirtier. When Snake is getting tortured, he has lacerations and bruises, blood and scrapes. Oddly enough, the girls never suffered such dirt and blood during and after battles. Their make-up appeared freshly applied, and their clothes stayed clean – even The Boss’ white body suit… To be fair, when Eva gets impaled by a stick (through both back and front) she did have a small, neat red circle on her jumper. But that cleaned up nicely.

More Game/Film Reflections
Games as film…Not earth shattering news in the world of game studies, but I have been thinking about the differences between the mediums from a few perspectives. First of is the obvious one; games that are intensely narrative driven are the (bastard) children of film. That games are nothing short of interactive cinema. The more I play FFX-2, the more I believe that this theory has some merit (more than I have given it credit in the past). I do think that games have the capacity to move beyond this choose your own adventure style, but I am not so sure solo, narrative-dependent games do so. Sports, racing, network and mmo games do break out of the narrative mode somewhat – but there is still room for innovation.

One of the (obvious) differences is that a game does not need narrative as in depth as a film. This is why (imo) games-cum-movies don’t quite live up to the expectations. Games rely on other elements to entertain. The play elements make up for the lack of solid story, or developed characters. Resident Evil is a great game. But the movie – for me – was little more than the game without the interuptions of the load screen and ‘game over’ resets.

There is also something different in watching someone play a game compared to watching a film. Besides the story line being a bit thinner (although Final Fantasy does not fall into this category), the interuptions of narrative caused by ‘game play’ act alot like commercials for me – an interuption of flow that is disruptive (and usually causes me to talk). The player’s emotions play a part in how I enjoy the game as a spectator. But I wonder what else seperates watching a movie and watching someone play a game.

Finally, a friend mentioned today about work that has been done on collaborative game play that resembles the actor/director relationship. I fell into this category last night when playing FFX-2 with my partner. He was very concerned with the efficiency of my game, directing my navigation… if I spent too much time exploring one corner too long, he would get impatient and tell me to move on. He instructed my battles and sighed when I died. The lesson I’ve learned was to play while he was at work so I could admire the scenery and take as much time I wanted exploring a ‘useless’ zone.

MMO’s for Dummies
It is stated more and more often, that mmo’s are reaching mainstream success demonstrated through the numbers. You can also see this in terms of World of Warcraft, never before have I met so many people where WoW is their first mmog.

So, is THIS a sign of mainstream success or is it a marketing attempt at luring more people into the web of mmog’s?

RPG Micro-Management
After putting in my first 2 hours of game play in FFX-2, I am already astonished at the level of micro management I have to do. I am used to MMORPG’s where each individual is responsible to fulfill their role as it pertains to the group as a whole. In solo play, I am responsible for developing the talents, and skills of each group member. When not in combat, this isn’t much to cry about. But in combat, I have to worry about each member’s hp’s, stats, poisons and antidotes… never mind mid combat weapon changes. Surely, this is not news to those who commonly play single player rpg’s, but to me it seems like a lot of arduous multi-tasking!